Blog Rant, confidence, Miscellaneous, self-confidence, self-esteem, Tips and Philosophys

Does rejection hurt or is it your outlook? Welcome to the Trial and Error Mindset

Woman slapping man

So rejection can be a bitch but is it really that bad?

I mean I understand you end up invested in this girl, you really care about her, she is sexy, got a great personality, smart, everything you seem to be looking for and she says something like “I really think you are awesome but I just see you as a friend.” This is a bad form of rejection that happens because you never admitted to her what you wanted, until it was too late and you were really needy.

But….. THAT ISN’T the form of rejection I want to focus on. I want to focus on the rejection people worry about when it comes to just approaching a woman you are initially attracted to. That sexy girl you are interested in across the room, the one you should go introduce yourself to but you are terrified she’ll reject you.

drink-thrown-in-face1

Do you think she is going to throw a drink in your face? I mean how often has that happened?

Why on earth are you so terrified of rejection? Is it because her opinion this girl that you have never seen before and may never see again wasn’t interested? So what? Who gives a fuck if some woman you were interested in isn’t interested in… Shit happens.

guy slapped

I’ve never in my life experienced a slapped in my life nor a drink thrown in my face, I know when it’s time to go.

Take a look at life overall, how you learned to walk, how you learned to talk, read, write, EVERYTHING…. What happened throughout life? YOU FAILED MISERABLY a bunch of times, you read the word wrong, said it wrong, fell on the ground learning to walk. So how is it we learn overall? TRIAL AND ERROR… Don’t complicate this guys, we all learn the same way by doing it wrong.

Artificial intelligence computers are all based on the same concept, trial and error. Everything isn’t learning from doing things right but from doing things wrong until you found out how to do it right.

So let’s take a closer look at how you should look at rejection. If failing is just part of the process of learning what is it? A lesson, just like stepping wrong, just like speaking wrong, just like reading wrong, it is simply a lesson. Ok perhaps I shouldn’t have came on this strong, perhaps I should have come on stronger, behavior adjustments along the way to make your skill level higher in EVERY aspect of life.

If you want to be successful you must at the very least RISK failure, however the most successful people you have ever seen all failed miserably along their journey to success. It is just a part of the process of being human. When someone says to you “You failed” your mental response (or verbal for that matter) simply needs to be, no I learned a lesson. I was temporarily deterred but failure implies I’m done, I’ve only begun.

If you just walk up and a girl isn’t interested it could be for any number of reasons that aren’t related to you…. Dating a guy (happily), you remind her physically of her asshole ex, you remind her of some negative moment in her past, you aren’t her type, whatever reason rejection literally can have nothing to do with you, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t critique your behaviors and realize when you need improvement vs. when it simply wasn’t anything to do with you.

Rejection isn’t a physical issue as long as you carry yourself properly and know when no means no. Though I suppose you can end up like this guy if you go too far…. Just be sure to be a responsive male. Not some creepy dude that comes on way too strong.

hit in the groin

We’ve all been rejected, but it isn’t rejection that hurts, it’s your outlook on it. I mean honestly do you think that girl physically hurt you? That is irrational, what hurts about some stranger not being interested? NOTHING, you hurt yourself. Rejection is inevitable in life, failure is inevitable, it truly is your reaction to such a thing that counts. Am I some stud that gets 90% of women? Fuck no, I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but I am good at being who I am and in doing so give those around me the permission to do the same.

Don’t worry about rejection, take it for what it is, a lesson. What can you get out of it when it was in your control? What should you have done differently? It’s no big deal. Don’t make it one. It’s your reaction to rejection truly matters, not the rejection itself. Don’t worry about it at all. Don’t take rejection personally, how could it be personal if she doesn’t know you?

Just some thoughts on this whole rejection doesn’t build confidence or rejection hurts business, fact is, it doesn’t your outlook on it does. Rejection in relationships is a bit more personal and heart wrenching I will admit.

Peace and Love,

Vic

P.S. With all the crazy blind fear of rejection I wanted to hear some of the worse(and I have heard some douzies) so I started a funny fan page… Worst rejections ever Check it out here. It’s only a few days old so just add some if you want one. Never fear telling someone elses story either. Don’t be afraid to act like it’s someone else, remember we’ve all been rejected at some point.

Click Here and Add to the page.

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About Science of Natural Game

I understand what it’s like to be that guy who struggles with women. I was god awful with women, I not once but twice went multiple years without sex, and I promise it wasn’t by choice. Ignorance played a large role in my issues with women, if I would have known now back in the days my dating life would have never slouched. I got desperate for affection with women, I wished I could have more. I read those pick up manuals, I read books by scientists on courtship. I went out and experienced what worked for me, and what “worked for others”. I found a process that makes every man skilled with women. I realized something else, yeah some of this stuff might work for some guys but we are all a little different and that’s a good thing… what I say may not be what you say, but there is a simple science and process to getting good with women and if you follow this process you will indeed be happy with your abilities with women. The most important thing for me is for you to be you, I don’t want to change who you are, I want you to love who you are, I want you to understand who you are, and I want you to be happy about all of it. I won’t ask you to dress up in peacocking outfit, I’ll ask you to be the most attractive guy by giving you skills and assets. Being you will be the peacock, will get you the attention of beautiful women. Most guys will simply tell you what to say and that will get you laid… but what happens when I am not here to tell you what to say? When what I have to say feels bland and not quite you? I don’t want you to be anyone else but you, the best you and the Man you want to be. I won’t tell you what to say, I’ll teach you to have a conversation. I won’t lie to you, I’ll tell you how it is and give you the facts. I won’t say it to be mean, I will say it for you to grow and become your best you with women and for you. I want you to be honest, knowledgeable, and sexy, and you will be when I’m done with you. Knowledge is power, and honesty is sexy…. I am not asking you to be anyone else, after all everyone else is already taken. If you need help or support with anything I am here, because I care about you. I want you to be a great, I want you to be all you can be. I want you to be your best self and that means I am here to support you in all your endeavors in life, not just with women but living the life you want… if you want to travel let’s figure out how, if you want to dance let’s teach you, if it’s weight loss let’s figure it out, if you want to surf let’s get you on a board, let’s give you the life you want and dream about, to let you be the you dream of being. I feel there is a process to getting women and more importantly getting good with women, it’s a science and if you follow the process it will work for you. Science isn’t about what’s true, as the truth is merely a perception science is the process we conclude will give us results… that’s what I give guys – results, the ability to get the women that will make them happy and help them live the life they love. Peace and Love, Vic

Discussion

5 thoughts on “Does rejection hurt or is it your outlook? Welcome to the Trial and Error Mindset

  1. The reason i come here today is that i fear misunderstandings ,miscues and getting the wrongly perceived signal which is not what it actually was in approaching a girl i think i might be liking or vice verse .I just dont want to make a mistake that causes me to regret my decision about doing someting or saying someting or asking something i shouldn.t have to the girl in question . So i just need to be sure whether am i receiving proper attraction cues or is she just trying to be helpful and kind .

    Posted by Babar | 22/02/2013, 7:35 pm
    • Misunderstandings happen…I will misread body language here and there.

      While you do need to read body language and react properly as anyone good at game is a responsive male, or someone who calibrates.

      I will say this the things I regret most are not what I tried but what I didn’t try. When I should have tried to kiss the girl or should have escalated.

      As far as getting better at reading attraction, you just need to keep practicing reading. Go out and talk to girls but also be observant of other guys picking up on girls and their behavior when they are obviously attracted. Watch movies on silent when you know the woman is attracted to the man. Just practice reading body language everywhere.

      You also have my does she like me show body language series that should help a ton…. There is over 2 hrs worth of info on just reading attraction. If that wasn’t the answer you were hoping for ask away.

      Peace and Love,

      Vic

      Posted by Science of Natural Game | 23/02/2013, 12:48 pm
      • Thanks for a response .Just to give a simple reason why i wrote here to get a response is this . Currently im in Japan living in this dorm in Kobe .There is an international house office in this dorm where i am currently now at. Theres this new Japanese girl who just joined not too long ago the international house office of the dorm . How can i know if she is interested in me or just a little attracted to me or is she just naturally like that ? .For one thing i find her eyes cute and a little big for the average japanese woman .

        Posted by Babar | 23/02/2013, 2:50 pm
  2. By the way im a foreign student resident at this dorm in Japan for you r kind information.

    Posted by Babar | 23/02/2013, 2:53 pm
    • Hey babar
      If you are having trouble establishing attraction with the basics, just go talk to her…. wait to see a reaction of attraction or not… That is the easiest way.

      You sometimes unfortunately just have to risk it.

      Peace and Love,

      Vic

      Posted by Science of Natural Game | 24/02/2013, 11:01 pm

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