Attraction, Courtship, Initial Attraction

The Keys to Getting Laid: The Big 3- Attraction, Connection, and Escalation

When it comes to picking up a woman things are pretty simple, courtship is a simple process that has a ton of complications along the way.  It is so simple to get laid and yet so difficult for so many. There are different models to follows when it comes to courtship, I’ve read about 3(anthropologist, biologist, and zoologist(coming soon)). The steps are certainly easy to read, easy to follow, which is why routine game in pick up is so easy because it creates an easy step by step process.

I read a lot about people talking about attraction, talking about connection, and talking about being sexual when it comes to picking up on women. When you really look at the courtship process you can get to sex by going directly sexual (60 Years of Challenge, Stelar, Gunwitch). When you look at a connection guys talk about there is nothing more special than connecting, that’s how you get in her pants, that’s the way you go. Then you look at attraction this is basic either she finds you attractive or she doesn’t, but you can become attractive.

Can you get laid from just being attractive? Absolutely! Same with just escalation or just a connection, each style has its pros and cons. What I don’t understand is why more folks don’t talk about the reality of natural courtship, a true natural courtship process starts with being or becoming attractive.

My style is to utilize all 3, if I can go without a connection why not but it’s rare. The courting process can be quick or long (2 minutes, 2 hrs, 2 weeks, 2 month, 2 years), some people court for a long time before having sex. I’m someone who prefers efficiency which means less work more results. This means I aim for both a high close rate, low approach rate, and to gain results as quickly and easily as possible.

Attraction

You don’t have to be attractive to her for her to have sex with you; the true story is she’d fuck you for a number of other reasons. Sounds crazy right? It’s really not; people fuck for crazy reasons (money to blackmail to curiosity to boredom). However, the easiest way to fuck a woman is to become attractive to her. She won’t be wet and wild if she doesn’t want to fuck you, maybe I’m weird but I would rather have no sex than bad sex these days.

Now I’m a good looking guy but by no means am I even close to being a “hottie”, my hotness is “ugly hot”, it is my personality that is the most attractive part of me. So my first step in my particular process is become attractive to the woman. This usually happens with ease for me, it involves making them feel good by humor and making them smile. I become attractive by being joking and flirting, pretty simple.

Pro: Being attractive can get you laid, but it doesn’t get you laid often without other skills.

Con: Getting laid by just being attractive means you get lucky. Not that you are good with women. Being attractive never gets a man laid with consistency. Otherwise every “hot guy” would be swimming in pussy.

Connection

You can easily fuck a girl without a connection. 60 years of challenge talks about how your escalation is your way of building attraction, your confidence and arrogance in your escalation is attractive. It has its perks for sures, straight and to the point. His whole direct goal is to go the route of skipping the bull shit and just finding women who want to fuck. It is a one night stand tactic and it has its value for sure.

However when you look at the natural courtship process a woman who goes the distance and fucks a guy she normally feels something for him. She gets to the point where she is connected to him, she feels like she knows him, she wants to be with him. Well let’s face it I can’t put a connection with someone in words and certainly can’t cover it in one article but a connection is very important when it comes to getting laid in a lot of pick-ups. One of the easiest ways to get laid by women is to learn to build a connection.

Pro: Building a connection is one of the best parts of the human experience. Learning to build a connection can certainly get you laid.

Con: Building too much rapport gets you in the “friend zone”. If you build too much rapport you end up becoming husband material and she won’t sleep with you because she’ll have an attachment issue(he’ll leave me after he fertilizes).

Sexual Escalation

This is the final step before courtship regardless of the other steps this one MUST HAPPEN. At some point the interaction goes sexual, verbally, or physically, most of the time both.  This is very important to getting to sex.  In order for you to consistently get laid and not just “get lucky” you need to learn to escalate. Pretty basic pretty simple, you need to get sexual to get sex. The guys who get laid the most know how to escalate.

When you get lucky it’s usually because she does a good majority of the work. She let you get her alone, she gave you the “in”. Once you get escalation skills you just make your opportunity when it “feels” right. Escalation skills aren’t about reading a book (though getting a good idea is key) they are about going out and practicing. Field work and experience (good and bad) is the key to becoming excellent at building sexual tension.

Seduction is all about being sexual, confident, and owning escalation skills. This is why so many guys can get laid so often even with skipping the connection in the natural courtship process. They constantly sexualize until they find takers, it’s more a numbers game than a skill when you play constant escalation. It’s too simple for me to call it a skill. I respect(especially the balls) and appreciate its simplicity but that doesn’t make it a skill.

Pro: This is by far the best tactic to go with if you don’t have the others and you are after one nighters. If you just want same night lays I recommend escalation skills.

Cons: Escalating can be creepy and over responsive can close doors. If you move faster than she is ready for you she’ll likely say no. Your goal is to get past her slut shield and it goes up with frequency when you move faster than her.

Putting it Together

When I go to pick up a woman I start with illustrating myself as attractive. My attractiveness is due to my personality and charisma, this means having them interact with me to build attraction. As I continue to build more attraction I move on to building a connection, which is relatively simple. Using my rapport tactics you can build a connection with ease. It doesn’t take as long as you would think to build a connection and you merely capitalize by understanding the natural process and simulating it.

This is the most important part and it’s important you realize that if you don’t do this you won’t ever get to sex without escalating. You need to escalate. Now how quickly should you start to escalate sexually? Pretty much as soon as attraction is built, as soon as you see she is attracted add some sexual joking in, don’t come on too strong but acknowledge her attraction by beginning to build sexual tension. As soon as you can, sometimes you need to build a connection before going very sexual but you can build them at the same time. It’s not about same night kisses, or phone numbers it’s about learning to build genuine sexual tension. At the end of the interaction if you know how to properly escalate sexually she’ll want sex more than you, that is your ultimate goal to let their sexual desires surpass yours. How do you make sure you get laid every time? Make her want to fuck more than you.

Peace and Love,

Vic

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About Science of Natural Game

I understand what it’s like to be that guy who struggles with women. I was god awful with women, I not once but twice went multiple years without sex, and I promise it wasn’t by choice. Ignorance played a large role in my issues with women, if I would have known now back in the days my dating life would have never slouched. I got desperate for affection with women, I wished I could have more. I read those pick up manuals, I read books by scientists on courtship. I went out and experienced what worked for me, and what “worked for others”. I found a process that makes every man skilled with women. I realized something else, yeah some of this stuff might work for some guys but we are all a little different and that’s a good thing… what I say may not be what you say, but there is a simple science and process to getting good with women and if you follow this process you will indeed be happy with your abilities with women. The most important thing for me is for you to be you, I don’t want to change who you are, I want you to love who you are, I want you to understand who you are, and I want you to be happy about all of it. I won’t ask you to dress up in peacocking outfit, I’ll ask you to be the most attractive guy by giving you skills and assets. Being you will be the peacock, will get you the attention of beautiful women. Most guys will simply tell you what to say and that will get you laid… but what happens when I am not here to tell you what to say? When what I have to say feels bland and not quite you? I don’t want you to be anyone else but you, the best you and the Man you want to be. I won’t tell you what to say, I’ll teach you to have a conversation. I won’t lie to you, I’ll tell you how it is and give you the facts. I won’t say it to be mean, I will say it for you to grow and become your best you with women and for you. I want you to be honest, knowledgeable, and sexy, and you will be when I’m done with you. Knowledge is power, and honesty is sexy…. I am not asking you to be anyone else, after all everyone else is already taken. If you need help or support with anything I am here, because I care about you. I want you to be a great, I want you to be all you can be. I want you to be your best self and that means I am here to support you in all your endeavors in life, not just with women but living the life you want… if you want to travel let’s figure out how, if you want to dance let’s teach you, if it’s weight loss let’s figure it out, if you want to surf let’s get you on a board, let’s give you the life you want and dream about, to let you be the you dream of being. I feel there is a process to getting women and more importantly getting good with women, it’s a science and if you follow the process it will work for you. Science isn’t about what’s true, as the truth is merely a perception science is the process we conclude will give us results… that’s what I give guys – results, the ability to get the women that will make them happy and help them live the life they love. Peace and Love, Vic

Discussion

89 thoughts on “The Keys to Getting Laid: The Big 3- Attraction, Connection, and Escalation

  1. Hey wow! Ive nominated you for the ‘One Lovely Blog’ award! Check out the link and congrats!
    http://yychristian.wordpress.com/2012/06/14/winning/

    Posted by YYChristian | 14/06/2012, 8:47 am
  2. GREAT article man!

    Posted by Warped Mindless | 16/06/2012, 11:55 am
  3. I agree almost totally with this article.

    My only qualm comes in when it comes to going direct sexually.Since I’m an indirect PUA,going direct sexually is totally against my style.

    I only time I’d go direct,is if I’m dealing with a club chic who’s wasted and at buying temperature where she just wanna k-close some guy.

    Posted by Socialkenny | 16/06/2012, 2:38 pm
    • I am all about indirect look at my natural open, it’s my style to go indirect. You don’t seem to know much about my style for someone who wants to roll on here and start saying things on behalf of my style.

      At some point you must advance the interaction sexually, this may mean touch(kino) or verbally. You have to acknowledge that this will be a sexual interaction, otherwise you are wasting your time. That can’t be denied.

      The other night I went direct at one point, I didn’t say one word to a woman for 30 minutes (attraction and connection were built) while we were kissing and touching except, “I’m going to fuck the shit out of you.” Nothing else but silence, my hands, breath, and her thoughts. Was that direct? Yes but not at that moment, it was perfect.

      My style is to read a woman and respond accordingly (following her response curve), whether that means more sexual or less sexual depends on the attraction and the connection, and of course the target. I believe in being a social chameleon the right man for her at this moment lands the highest percentage of women with my tactic.

      As I said I combine all three, so I start with focusing on attraction, this happens along with comfort/connection(for me the first two come hand and hand), then go to sexual escalation. Sexual escalation doesn’t have to be direct but touching an elbow or a side rather than a shoulder, grazing her ass with your hand and letting it linger. Me on the other hand? I realized a long time ago, women like a MAN that is more direct after connection, attraction, and some tension is built.

      Don’t be afraid to grab a woman’s hand once attraction is built, and pull her outside without saying a word. This builds tension and leads, two things confident men do especially once they know the women is attracted. There doesn’t need to be a lot of tension, just wait for a 5 second quiet moment (like a kiss moment), grab her hand and walk her to where you are going. She will follow if you’ve done your job.

      My model is the best I’ve read in the 20,000 plus pages I’ve studied and dozens of documentaries. It covers all the ways within your own power that you can get laid, and combines them. Does this mean it won’t be changed? Nope, it’s always morphing so I’ll likely add more along the way (this is after all a broad spectrum each area has tons of details). Of course my style is also based on reading people, understanding people, and being able to predict behavior, it’s not easy to keep up with my style and I’ve learned more to become the man of fantasy than a PUA.

      Posted by The Science of Natural Game | 16/06/2012, 3:12 pm
      • Ok that makes sense.

        I’m there with you on the tension building once the girl is attracted.KINO is big for you too I see.

        Posted by Socialkenny | 17/06/2012, 6:44 pm
  4. BTW,finally,Attraction,connection and escalation.

    It’s the 3-core standard way of seduction of any model in the community.

    Attraction,connection/confort/rapport,seduction phase/escalation.

    Posted by Socialkenny | 28/06/2012, 12:29 pm
    • Are you saying other folks don’t follow the model? Or that nobody else seems to consistently mention how important all 3 really are? Sorry I was just kind of confused by some of the vagueness.

      Posted by The Science of Natural Game | 28/06/2012, 12:43 pm
      • I was being vague intentionally lol.

        Well I’m of the belief that every guy who gets laid has a system/model.He just cannot verbalize it(as in a natural) as a PUA like I can.

        Most of us use NLP when trying to persuade ppl,but we just don’t know it,and some of us are bad at it.

        Posted by Socialkenny | 28/06/2012, 1:46 pm
      • Yeah most PUAs have to gain a system or outline because they don’t have that experience to gauge off of.

        Yeah, since I’ve been studying language patterns I’ve realized I have a lot of good diction, I just need to learn to use it in the right situations more consistently. I have natural charisma, a lot of it has to do with my language and how I talk to people, but my body language is exceptional when it comes comforting and building rapport as well.

        I’ve been reading Sexual Key by Fuentes (highly Recommend it by the way) and it’s made me realize why women seem to be attracted to me from an intellectual and emotional standpoint. I have a great language pattern when it comes to attracting women, like I said just need to learn to use it during more seductive moments and to set up more sexual tension.

        I’m looking to become the most complete man you can(body language, text, auditory, understanding, etc.). This means understanding and communicating with women on every level(even subconscious). I’m pretty scary with women anyways, it should be interesting to see what happens in the future with my skills as I improve even further.

        I’m afraid with my new venture I will have to make my life more public, show my skills, and prove them.

        Posted by The Science of Natural Game | 28/06/2012, 2:19 pm
  5. Without a doubt you’re eventually gonna have to demo this lol.

    It’s different if a guy can talk it but can’t walk it and put it in action.

    Posted by Socialkenny | 28/06/2012, 4:04 pm
    • Oh don’t worry, I’ve already got this stuff in action, I also have very experienced people who completely confirm what I do and say(they caught on to me, sought me out, and are the ones who asked me to be a consultant). I just don’t like to talk too much about it.

      As soon as I get four more articles written and re-write my FreE-book I’m going to let myself go play more. I just have plans of getting some things done, I have to be disciplined, lol basically I know myself.

      Always progressing if not I feel I’m falling behind.

      Posted by The Science of Natural Game | 28/06/2012, 5:12 pm
      • But you have tons of youtube video already.

        But I was talking about proving your skills in field.Not by saying that your friends know what you’re capable of.But actually video taping via camera,cellphone,etc.

        Most of the PUA and Gamers in the UK,they’re not shy about in-field video.

        Posted by Socialkenny | 28/06/2012, 5:39 pm
      • I have proved myself in the field. I’d rather someone come in the field and watch me operate and then write about it, I feel a little weird about video taping these things. I suppose with time I’ll be comfortable doing it. Not my friends knowing what I’m capable of, my friends have seen me operate, I was saying guys who have no relation to me with lots of experience with women have read my stuff and said that I was spot on. It’s not like I went looking for testimonials, people thanked me, or the experienced ones said “Wow! I can’t believe how perfectly you break down the process.” (The forum you were talking about with Ryan I just got accepted in PMZ for my “contributions” to the forum)

        Remember though I capitalize when I feel like it, this could be at work, at the bar, club, or a restaurant or some random place. Going sarging would be unique to me because it simply isn’t in my style, I don’t like to put pressure on myself to score, rather have fun and score when I feel like it. Though I have set out to get some woman’s number and gotten it, I just rarely go out with the intention of getting women. Fun comes first, then girls(though they can certainly come hand and hand 🙂 ).

        Note: In 2010 people were asking me to apply myself to this body language stuff from an online marketing stand point and write a book. I didn’t feel like I deserved it until now when I became this skilled with people and women. Now I finally am going to unleash a lot of my knowledge for people.

        People at this point can enjoy it and accept it for the truth it is(based on science) or they can say I’m a full of shit, but I’ve tested and proved my theories. Others have confirmed my thoughts. Hopefully I’ll be comfortable enough with this stuff to show myself in action as of now, not so much.

        Posted by The Science of Natural Game | 28/06/2012, 6:14 pm
      • @ socialkenny’s comment: Video tape??!! That thought freaks me the fuck out, I can only hope you would be referring that this would happen to someone who was aware that his was taking place, but given he context that you are asking skills to be proved I can only assume that it wouldn’t be in order for the data to be relevant. My suggestion to you would be to take what you will from the information provided and prove it to yourself with the results you obtain. If your asking for more proof than that, put together a research study.

        @SNG: I probably only ask this because SK’s comment creeped me out a bit… I really enjoy meeting people and forming a natural connection, but the idea that someone could learn to simulate a connection is an unsettling thought. I would like to believe I am good at identifying the tools people use to start an artificial connection and then shooting holes in that until your left with what’s really there. Although the short term connections I make will rarely lead to any sort of sexual interaction, I can’t help but feel emotionally violated at the thought of falling for a simulated connection. Any words of advice for a girl that has a fetish for knowing what’s real?

        Posted by Bella SesosBesos | 14/07/2012, 9:45 am
      • Simulated connections are based off of the natural courtship process, so if I was to simulate a connection nothing would be different. You wouldn’t notice a difference if someone knows how to do it right. Why is unsettling to simulate a connection? All you are doing is what some people do naturally anyways. Some men who do this stuff naturally without thought are guys you don’t want using it at all.

        I believe in teaching this stuff because some guys are genuinely good guys who don’t know how to connect, so why not teach it to people. Most people are good and you have to realize a bad person who wants to use this info can get it and use it but try and be optimistic.

        The easiest way to avoid fake guys is to follow your instincts. If something feels off about a guy, then avoid him something probably is. A woman’s intuition is a powerful and she get’s a lot of her reads of the world based off of how she feels.

        You can look into basic lie detection as well, if a man is being deceptive he’ll show it in some of his nonverbal behaviors most of the time.

        Posted by The Science of Natural Game | 14/07/2012, 6:01 pm
  6. @Bella-Well the reason we video tape what we do is to demo to guys who have less skills as pick up.

    On my Youtube channel,I have vids’ of me picking up chics.It sint done to prove anything but just to show guys how it’s done.

    Anyone can talk it but to show it is a whole different ball game.

    Research study is what we do already on our blogs.But people wanna see real-world demonstrations.

    Posted by Socialkenny | 14/07/2012, 10:11 am
  7. SNG: I like your response, respect what you do and have confidence that you are doing it for positive purposes. Thanks for the reminder that my intuition is always the most reliable source. It seems that you have respect for women and your angle is right on.. I came across your blog thinking in would be an glance to stupid things guys do to impress, however I ended up learning more about myself in the process of reading.

    Kenny: I understand that you may use video to demonstrate a point, I think what is concerning was this idea of being video taped with out my knowledge while I was thinking I was talking to a guy who was genuinely interested in me. I understand that you research your own techniques to find out what works but what I meant is that real research is always done in an ethical fashion no harm no foul. Your previous remark did not say I wanna see you demonstrate something you asked to have field proof by video tape. What are you asking him to prove? If what SNG is doing works the only person who needs that proof is the the ladies he is proving it to. But that’s just my personal opinion. I don’t mean any disrespect to you but your comment kinda creeped me out. I am sure you wouldn’t want any of your female family members secretly videotaped just to prove a point.

    Posted by Bella SesosBesos | 14/07/2012, 6:45 pm
    • Thank YOU, I’m glad you appreciate my blog. Makes it worth it when you hear good stuff. Also good to hear about people learning stuff. Ask any question you may have and I’ll answer to the best of my abilities.

      And Yes I do love and respect women. I’m not really too big of a PUA, I just prefer to be myself. The women that are my type will be attracted to me. Since I’m looking for a possible future wife for a family I don’t want to be a PUA, I want to be the best man I can be. In reality women pick up on me. They put their number in my phone, and text me. I actually don’t try with women as arrogant as that sounds, if they are interested in me good, if not sweet lets have fun anyways (joke, laugh, flirt, have drinks, it doesn’t have to be for sex).

      I named it the science of natural game because I’d rather teach people to be more attractive and follow the natural courtship process then to sit their and lie about their past, name, or any other thing. I don’t believe in bullshit routines. I teach men to have game, not just pick up women. If you have game you can pick up people (have people skills), then you will also get love in many other ways from everyone (free drinks, into clubs, etc.). “Life is all about build relationships.” I’d have to agree with this quote, the more relationships you build the better your life will be. It’s why I avoid sleeping with women in relationships if possible (sometimes they don’t tell me), always better to build relationships then break them.

      The best a guy can be with women is be a confident man who is no one else but himself, and have an understanding of the natural courtship process (dos and don’ts as well as the flow of it) and women.

      Peace and Love

      Vic

      Posted by The Science of Natural Game | 14/07/2012, 7:31 pm

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