Now that I’ve kind of gone over some of my ideals behind attraction I will let you know what I did in this particular case to build attraction. This girl was an extension of the group, she didn’t directly know the birthday girl she knew friends of the hers.
My behavior was confident, I had wide relaxed shoulders, I was having fun (not a high stress case, “low value male”, betas, unconfident people, whatever you want to call them), dancing around, smiling, laughing, wide stance, and I was interacting and joking with everyone. I was attracting a lot of attention.
I noticed she was the only cute girl in the group that was single and that being the case these guys were all giving her their attention. Me being me, didn’t give her much attention and interacted with the birthday girl and my friends I hadn’t seen for a minute. I was a social butterfly talking to everyone, except for her. She was getting enough attention and I refuse to be one of her minions following her around. I was doing the opposite of the rest of them.
So my goal was to show attraction while showing only a vague interest. How am I suppose to show attraction with vague interest, hint at attraction, while myself holding high value in the social circle? I made eye contact and smiled at her(she in turn displayed an attraction cluster), that was it. I did this repeatedly but without overdoing it and seeming creepy. However I never left my conversation, I just kept on joking around and having fun with my friends. Our eyes would just meet here and there, I would smile confidently.
As the night was going on we started to make more frequent eye contact. Then I finally broke the ice, I don’t even remember what I said. Just something joking around. She smiled and we closed the distance a little to flirt, she sent an attraction cluster.
After I broke the ice a little, I made sure not to allow the conversation to go stale. I left the interaction before it could, after all I had the rest of the night to continue on, and if I wasn’t careful I would just be another one of the minions in the group following her around. So I moved away and returned to the folks I knew in the group.
She looked over as I dismissed her unlike any of the other guys in the group. I was doing the opposite of everyone else. It was working beautiful, I stood out, I was confident (high value, or whatever you want to call it), and she was interested because I wasn’t like the rest of the guys going after her, I was the challenge, I was different.
I owned the power in this attraction because I didn’t care. Pretty simple, pretty easy, the person who cares the least owns the interaction.
She was however paying attention to me, she began to close the distance my job was only to meet her half way, then pull back a little (two steps forward one step back). I follow her responsive cure. Leaving myself just enough room for her to advance it more while I made her feel comfortable. I find it much easy to build comfort and attraction by just knowing what is cool and what isn’t. Proper gauging of each girl and interaction is important. You must push some, but if they are more attracted to you then you are to them, you have a little bit more to work with. You don’t have to push it so hard, they will.
By the end of the night, we would end up shoulder shoulder smiling, touching, and joking. Then she starting hitting me jokingly. I joked back with little statements(it happened 3 or 4 times), “Such violence at such a young age, what is up with that?”, “Man I haven’t seen a girl hit someone she has a crush since second grade.” “Do you always hit strangers? What have I done to deserve this?”
These statements sound kind of crazy but with the right tone, confidence, tact, timing, and body language, you can say almost anything. With each little moment I was building more and more attraction, little statements, the right amount of attention, and the correct escalation I was quickly becoming the guy in the group most attractive to her. She was smiling almost the whole time while we were interacting by the end.
At some points I’d mirror and copy her hand gestures, moving her arms. Same shoulder posture, same stance. Not to over do it but just enough to gain a subconscious attraction because we are alike. We have the same posture and gestures, we are alike and it is easy to be attracted to someone that is like you with high value and very social behavior. Gain some comfort along with all this and it is easy to build a serious amount of attraction.
As we finally went to leave I had built up enough rapport that she wanted me to come back and hang out at the miniature after party which I declined. I had built attraction simply by following the natural courtship process.