Some thoughts on Sexual Beliefs- Self-Limiting and Sexual Outlook

I love sex, it is an amazing feeling. I can explain the entire break down about what happens during orgasm chemically or physically but does it really do it justice? Sex, sex, sex, I think about it all the time, I’ve read dozens of books to get better with women or more specifically so I can find more sex.

“I’d only don’t once but now I could articulate why men love sex so much.  ’Cause while you’re doing you feel like you are as good if not better than every other man.” – Matthew in 100 Girls

The knowledge of what to do wasn’t the only thing that held me up when it came to my inactivity with women my sexual beliefs were just as big a road block. I would self-sabotage myself or freeze up or whatever because of my sexual beliefs. This isn’t the movies meeting women isn’t always going to be romantic.

Sexual Outlook

Your Sexual behavior is based on your subconscious outlook on sex. It seems like something we ignore so much especially here in America is our sexual side, our primal animal instinctual need for sex. Our outlook on sex in America is very, very wrong from my perspective. We are human regardless, we are born into this American culture. Why on earth should we deny that we are animals?

Our sexual beliefs shape a lot about our enjoyment or lack of enjoyment when it comes to sex. Among our sexual beliefs is our sexual outlook, sometimes we try to think our conscious outlook on sex is our sexual belief but our beliefs are different they are that ingrained subconscious outlook on sex. Americans are raised in a lot of cases to “be good”, and “sex is wrong.” “Don’t have sex until you are married.” “It is wrong to have sex,” bla bla bla, really? How can the survival of our species be wrong? If you are a God fearing loving person why not embrace what we were given? Enjoy sex, we were meant to, why do we have this odd perception that sex is wrong?

Sexual Outlook exposes our conflicting thoughts when it comes to sex. Seriously how can you be going out trying to have sex with women when your Mom, Dad, Priest, relative, teacher or whoever are chattering you up in your mind about what you are doing being wrong. A lot of us seem to have this guilt about sex, at least I did. I was raised heavily Catholic (altar boy until 15 anyone?), sex was wrong, no if, ands, or buts. Don’t do it, well that means I was denying the animal side of me that exists within us all.

We are all animals and as animals we have the instinct to create strong healthy offspring. When we let our PROGRAMMED Outlook get in the way of our instinctual animal side we have a conflict with sex. I’m no Programmer or Psychologist but I know this much you can’t override hardware and you are hardwired to want sex. You need to change your outlook to understanding we are all sexual creatures and need a little lovin’.

Sex is a Normal Behavior

One thing you need to take into consideration is sex is a normal behavior, it’s been around as long as mankind that is for sure. If not there would be no mankind. It is a normal behavior that we need to embrace, I’m not saying to devalue it to the point that it doesn’t matter who you fuck. Though that would be the rawest of animal instincts, I’m a big fan of keeping the Neocortex around. I’m saying make sure you enjoy sex, and place sex where it is, which a good normal behavior, after all you are the offspring of a long list of successful breeders.

Some More NLP

To start here is a quote from my Attraction blog(under Type):

We are humans who have been programmed over time. We are programmed to react negatively to some things and positively to others. The way we are programmed is through conditioning. We think of how painful the dentist was once and in doing so are conditioned to “hate the dentist.” When we think how great a movie is we associate a positive emotion, laughter or arousal (suspense movies arouse) are common reactions to movies that are positive. So you are conditioned to like that movie because of that feeling given by it. How we feel about things is through conditioning sometimes from one major pain, other times something as simple as a statement may change your behavior. However something conditions us to feel something.

Our sexual outlook is a product of our observations, experiences, and what we were told on behalf of sex growing up. When we were told those little bitty statements throughout our life we were influenced by them, programmed by them, our outlook was thus created over time. Sex is one of the most difficult things to talk about in America you can watch Documentaries like “Let’s Talk About Sex” and you see how we look at sex compared to Europeans. Our sexual outlook is unhealthy here in America (remember this is My Opinion not yours).

Sexual Education

We frown upon sexual education in the US and because of that we have this huge cycle of poor folks stuck, their kids fall into the same cycle. They aren’t taught about sexual protection, a woman’s anatomy (ovulation, pregnancy, etc.), what to do, or how to have sex. Well denying information will never stop a human from doing anything, it just means he’ll make the mistakes other have. I’m talking about what I witness every day, kids 18 or 19 years old come into my work with 2 kids sometimes more. That isn’t even giving you a shot at life. You haven’t prepared yourself for kids in this country. Why? Because I live in a conservative state named Utah where rather than talking to their kids about “the bird and the bees” they just say “don’t have sex”. Note: When I go to any other state women come on to me, I have to have skills to get women here in Utah.

Traumatic Experiences

Some sexual outlooks are created by traumatic experiences growing up or even during sexual active life. This is why people who have been sexually abused have such an odd outlook on sex, they devalue sex to a horrible point. They see sex as walking or talking. They don’t have too many qualifications when it comes to sex.  A traumatic experience such as rape completely changes our sexual outlook because we are conditioned by that one horrible experience. Sex gets associated with a negative experience and thus feels bad every time we have it.

Sexual Guilt

I’m not saying just because you want sex you should go out and fuck everything that walks, I’m saying that sex isn’t a behavior you should ever feel guilty about, wanting it or experiencing it. Our sexual outlook can take away our enjoyment of sex. I’ve met some people who felt so guilty about sex afterwards that it wasn’t even worth having sex. Why? Sex is fucking awesome.

So when it comes to Pick Up you may start like me, when you start out you may have a conflict with sex. You may have a feeling telling you something is wrong, it’s a rough patch to get through. Changing your outlook on sex can be one of the most important parts about pick up because our beliefs change so much of our behavior in regards to sex(not trying to go Freud on you). If you don’t have congruent beliefs with your actions you will inevitably sabotage yourself. Your Subconscious Sexual Outlook is an ingrained belief.

Self-limiting Sexual beliefs

Sexual beliefs can be another form of self-limiting beliefs. If you don’t have belief in your cock size or your ability to please a woman you will lack confidence as well.  Sexual beliefs are huge but in PUA rarely get mentioned, I am not sure I understand why either, beliefs are a corner stone in being good with women.

Cock Size

In the past I had this obsession with my cock size, I thought it was too small, I’m an average size guy (solid girth) nothing special but I get it done. Well guys here is a hint when it comes to sex guys with huge cocks rarely understand how to use them. A lot of women hate guys with huge cocks, multiple women I’ve come across have complained about guys with big dicks just fucking them hard. Well here is a little info on the female species.

-The “g-spot” is at best 2 inches in on the top of the vaginal wall.

-The clit is on the outside and easy to stimulate as well, some women unfortunately require clitoral stimulation to cum anyways (these women normally prefer large penises)

-The Cervix is 3-4 inches in to the vagina, obviously taller women may have a cervix further in. The cervix for most women is an incredibly irritable experience and hurts many women. Thus more can be painful and not good.

Here is Snarky Snatch’s Celebration of the small penis for all you unconfident gentlemen in your cock size out there.

Performance- Gaining Sexual Confidence

At the end of the day it’s not what you have but how you use it. Learn to be a cunning linguist, learn to masturbate a woman, learn about a woman and what to do, learn to be a good lover. When I first started with women I lacked sexual confidence. Could you imagine? No sexual education, I was told not to have sex with a woman until marriage.

If you want to get good at sex you need to go out and read about it, watch videos (not porn guys), research it. Learn the female anatomy, learn a woman’s erogenous zones, learn the speed and pace of a woman, learn what makes her cum. I can’t give you enough info on sexual confidence in a blog but I can tell you gaining sexual confidence was one of the best beliefs I’ve ever gained. Just knowing, knowing you can make a woman cum 20 times. Knowing any woman who hooks up with you is the one getting lucky. It’s incredibly empowering to sit next to a woman about sex, teaching her about how she can enjoy sex. Talk about making her want you, could you imagine when you look at a woman and talk about how you can make a woman cum 20 times with ease? She wants to know if it’s true and how regardless.

To Women

If you want to be able to cum you have to have the belief a man can give you an orgasm. If you want to be able to cum 20 times in a session you must believe the man can do it. I say this because all of these articles I’ve been writing have been building towards anchoring a woman to orgasm. As bad as your past sexual experiences may have been, you can’t allow those experiences to form negative beliefs about sex.

It’s important to be optimistic because our mind tends to form our experiences(even future ones). A perfect example of how powerful is the placebo effect our belief that it will heal us heals us.Our belief that sex will be good has bad sex good in the past, and our belief that sex will be bad may have been bad merely because you expected and never gave your mind to him unfairly during sex(not that every man deserves it).

I’m not the most ridiculous sex guy, it’s not my specialty body language and human behavior are. I do however understand sex and how to please a women, I understand her beliefs about sex shape her enjoyment during it. It’s up to you to enjoy sex, that means communicating with men telling them what you want and how you want it done.

Concluding Your Sexual Beliefs

Your sexual beliefs should include a healthy outlook on sex, that means understanding sex is always consensual, it’s a healthy necessity, and sexual appetite is a normal HEALTHY part of being a human. You should avoid allowing a traumatic sexual experience change your outlook on sex (I know easier said than done, I’m not you and can’t tell you how to deal with your experience). I’m not a doc, I’d go see one if you have that big of a sexual outlook issue especially including sexual guilt.

Learn all about women sexually so you can have sexual confidence and understand how to make a woman cum, the more you understand the easier it is. The more sexual confidence you have the more you will exude to every woman you come across. They will feel your sexual confidence and want to experience it.

Peace and Love,

Vic

P.S. I now offer a self-confidence and happiness program. Available is True Core Self-Confidence and Happiness Program – This Program is dedicated to instilling astounding self-belief and self-confidence in all the way to your core!